donetryingtobe-ok:

moarghosts-n-stuff:

haventbeenaballofjoy:

typicalbrony:

colinfirth:

Matilda was left alone. That was how she liked it.

#forever pissed off that a five year old can make better pancakes than me

She could move things with her mind and was a god damn genius and you’re jealous of her pancake making.

Damn right I’m jealous of her pancake making. Pancakes are fucking tasty.

(Source: thelostie)

fallingaroundagain:

lupeylycan:

un-balanc-ed:

thatwrongthing:

this shirt would fit if it weren’t for boobs: a tragedy

that shirt would fit if i had boobs: the sequel 

this shirt fits perfectly because my boobs are the right size: the fanfiction

my shirts always fit: a man’s tale

k-i-t-t-e-n:

lieutenant-twitch:

This individual has obviously sacrificed a virgin over a blue-flamed fire while chanting pagan rituals to obtain this ability

What trickery is this!?

(Source: dellbby)

laystilllikethedead:

inwhyseaexoh:

palmist:

florels:

mean-maori:

mygoddessathena:

they have the exact same laughing face omg

Already Reblogged before but good lord, that freaking gene pool is amazing

DAVE MY BB

franco brothers omg

so sexy.

daaaaave

(Source: ishailed)

(Source: fuckingmexican)

me: makes a mistake
me: thinks about mistake every night for the next 7 years

1los:

Hold Close - IngridTan

"

1.
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says ‘No, you are beautiful.’
I wonder why I cannot be both.
He kisses me
hard.

2.
My college theater professor once told me
that despite my talent,
I would never be cast as a romantic lead.
We do plays that involve singing animals
and children with the ability to fly,
but apparently no one
has enough willing suspension of disbelief
to go with anyone loving a fat girl.
I daydream regularly
about fucking my boyfriend vigorously on his front lawn.

3.
On the mornings I do not feel pretty,
while he is still asleep,
I sit on the floor and check the pockets of his skinny jeans for motive,
for a punchline,
for other girls’ phone numbers.

4.
When we hold hands in public,
I wonder if he notices the looks —
like he is handling a parade balloon on a crowded sidewalk;
if he notices that my hands are now made of rope.

5.
Dear Cosmo: Fuck you.
I will not take sex tips from you
on how to please a man you think I do not deserve.

6.
He tells me he loves me with the lights on.

7.
I can cup his hip bone in my hand,
feel his ribs without pressing very hard at all.
He does not believe me when I tell him he is beautiful.
Sometimes I fear the day he does will be the day he leaves.

8.
The cute hipster girl at the coffee shop
assumes we are just friends
and flirts over the counter.
I spend the next two weeks
mentally replacing myself with her
in all of our photographs.
When I admit this to him
we spend the evening taking new photos together.
He will not let me delete a single one of them.

9.
The phrase “Big girls need love too” can die in a fire.
Fucking me does not require an asterisk.
Loving me is not a fetish.
Finding me beautiful is not a novelty.
I am not a fucking novelty.

10.
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says, ‘No. You are so much more’,
and kisses me
hard.

"

-Rachel Wiley  (via howweknewit)

(Source: sweetdeltablues)